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Labour MP seemingly risks worms to impress Reform voters

Labour MP Mike Tapp has become famous for three things:

  • Posting videos of himself pointing at full English breakfasts and saying things like ‘tuck in’ or ‘champion’.

  • Posting videos of himself doing the ‘Billy big bollocks’ routine on migration.

  • Posting videos of himself looking at flags in which he may as well be biting his bottom lip.

Given all the above, it’s commonly believed that Tapp is putting on a show to impress Reform voters (that or he’s going to defect to Farage at some point).

Mike Tapp generally knows how to reach this audience, but in his latest video he may have crossed the line from ‘gastro-enjoyer’ to ‘worm-haver’:

Did Tapp reuse that fork after Scooby had his mouth all over it?

We simply don’t know, and Tapp is refusing to answer.

British pie for Mike Tapp

The video opens with Tapp saying:

British pie.

This has led many to ask:

As far as we can tell, there is no ‘British pie’. Looking at the low res video he uploaded, though, it seems to be some sort of cottage or shepherd’s. Doing some research (i.e. reading Wikipedia), we discovered the following about this pie’s origin:

That’s right, folks, patriot Mike Tapp is feeding his dog a ‘British and French pie’.

Sacre bleu.

Why stop there, Mike – why not feed the poor thing snails?

Why even have a traditional British pet in the first place – why not have a monkey in a beret?

Because that is a British dog, right Mike?

That is a British dog?

Mike?

Mike?

Non-British dog

Obviously sensing that something is off with this guy, people asked questions like the following:


You’d think it must be, right, given that Mike Tapp posted an emoji of the Union Jack next to an emoji of a dog.

You’re not an emoji liar are you, Mike?

Doing some more research, we’ve narrowed the breed down to the following:

None of these dogs are British – not even the Rhodesian Ridgeback.

Combined with Tapp’s hostile migration stance, the dog’s foreign ancestry may explain why he’s poisoning the poor creature (allegedly):

While we’re at it, ‘Scooby’ is the name of an American dog who was friends with a drug user. Is this what stands for British patriotism now – doing Yank patois and alluding to the wacky baccy?

Still, all that is more seemly than the sickening innuendo on display in the following:

(Sausages aren’t British by the way, Mike).

Right of reply

We DM’d Mike Tapp to ask him the following:

  • When was the last time you wormed your dog?
  • Did you clean that fork before sticking it back in your mouth?

We also noted it was unclear what a ‘British pie’ is.

We didn’t receive a response to our questions. However, we were tipped off about another upcoming misadventure with Scooby. Tapp does have an insatiable hunger for pub grub – almost as if he’s eating for two.

True to form (and taunting us) Tapp has now posted the following:


You’ll note he didn’t use the fork to feed Scooby this time; he also exclaimed:

British pork.

 

Before we get back to work, we should note there is one more question that remains unanswered:


Disgraceful.

Featured image via Mike ‘British Pie’ Tapp

By Willem Moore

This post was originally published on Canary.