{"id":13918,"date":"2021-01-26T08:00:00","date_gmt":"2021-01-26T08:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.radiofree.org\/?p=154608"},"modified":"2021-01-26T08:00:00","modified_gmt":"2021-01-26T08:00:00","slug":"henry-rollins-on-defining-success","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/radiofree.asia\/2021\/01\/26\/henry-rollins-on-defining-success\/","title":{"rendered":"Henry Rollins on defining success"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Creative Blocks<\/h2>\n

I don\u2019t know if I\u2019ve ever had one. I\u2019m not trying to say I\u2019m somebody with a volcanic output coming out of me all the time, but if somebody ever says, \u201cWell, what do you do about writer\u2019s block?\u201d I\u2019m like, \u201cI don\u2019t think I\u2019m a writer.\u201d I don\u2019t put any of those titles on myself, so I don\u2019t acknowledge those pressures. Some days I got stuff, some days I don\u2019t, and some days I write about the fact I got nothing to write about. But, I do try to write 1,000 words a day. It\u2019s just like going to the gym. Some workouts are better than others. I think the less pressure you put on yourself, the better. In my opinion, it\u2019d be hard to sit in a room and go, \u201cOkay, damnit. Be creative.\u201d<\/p>\n

Some days you might not want to face the agony it takes to process the stuff you have in you\u2014but this kind of work is not for the fragile. You have to be somewhat of a warrior.<\/span> It\u2019s why you see a lot of writer types that are kind of angry, itchy people. That\u2019s because they\u2019re playing chess with their psyche all the time. You have to be ready to grapple with the fact that some days there will be nothing. You\u2019ve got to trust and remember that on other days there\u2019ll be too much and it\u2019ll make you crazy in a different way.<\/span> So, I don\u2019t really put that much pressure on myself to be like: \u201cOkay, it\u2019s Tuesday, I must be creative.\u201d I\u2019m gonna see if there\u2019s anything there first.<\/p>\n

More often than not, I just don\u2019t have the time or the strength to heft all the dots I want to connect in my mind. Finding the time to put it all down and having the skill to articulate it into a form that\u2019s understandable by someone else\u2014that\u2019s the challenge. Rarely is it a case of \u201cI\u2019ve got nothing.\u201d Sometimes when I\u2019m really depressed, there\u2019ll be nothing there because I\u2019m grappling with depression. But as soon as that lifts an inch, I can get my fingers under the door, jam it open, and get out.<\/p>\n

Sleep<\/h2>\n

I do two shifts. I do the day shift and the night shift.<\/span> The day shift is coming to an end. I\u2019m gonna take a nap, work out, eat, and then I\u2019ll be up to about two o\u2019clock this morning on the night shift. I like both: Daytime is more editing and business-y stuff and the nighttime is more the creative.<\/p>\n

I get about five hours of sleep a night. It ends up being between five and six during the week and then usually Friday night into Saturday, I\u2019ll hit it for more like six or seven hours\u2014but rarely do I do eight hours.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not exactly mister bouncing-with-energy guy. I\u2019m just kind of nervous and I want to go. The power nap is very instrumental in what I do. I take like one or two four to seven minute naps a day. I can sit in the chair in my office right in front of my computer and knock out for a solid four to six minutes and then wake up like \u201cboom!\u201d\u2026 Usually at the end of the day, I\u2019ll do another one of those right before I work out. I can skip it, but I feel groggy on the treadmill if I don\u2019t.<\/p>\n

I do a lot of pushups.<\/span> You know how people have drinking games where every time someone says something you got to take a drink? I try to listen to a lot of records every day, so at night I\u2019ll play a bunch of singles. Every time you flip the single over, you have to go do 15 or 20 pushups on your knuckles. And so, if you want to hear the other song, you gotta do your pushups. I get up, flip the record, pushups, and sit down. After a night of listening, I will be dead because I\u2019ve done so many pushups. I\u2019m always trying to burn calories and trying and get myself worn out enough to sleep. That\u2019s the problem: Getting tired enough to sleep.<\/span><\/p>\n

Multiple Creative Outlets<\/h2>\n

If I\u2019m not feeling writing one day, I always owe people a radio show. I work with multiple stations, so I owe about seven shows right now. If I don\u2019t get much writing done, I\u2019ll just go, \u201cOkay, I guess it\u2019s radio time,\u201d and just go bang away on that for a while. I just reckon if I\u2019m awake, I need to be doing something. Even if it\u2019s nothing, I\u2019m working in that nothingness. I usually have a notepad on any flat surface where I am because there\u2019s always a note to take down, an idea to come up with, a thing to do later.<\/span> I\u2019m rarely doing nothing.<\/p>\n

That\u2019s why I don\u2019t have a TV. Because I will watch it. I know I\u2019m susceptible. I\u2019d rather have leaner, more work-oriented surroundings, which is was what was around me as a kid. We had a small TV in our apartment\u2014my mom and I\u2014and every time I\u2019d turn it on or go towards it, she\u2019d go, \u201cOh, come on. Let\u2019s put a record on.\u201d Like, why are you falling for that when we could be listening to Bob Dylan or something. And she was right. The record is always better than the TV. She was like, \u201cLet\u2019s read aloud to each other instead.\u201d Then all of a sudden we\u2019re reading Great Expectations<\/em> by Dickens.<\/p>\n

I put myself in an environment where it\u2019s always easier to work than it is to eat.<\/span> I mean\u2014even in the kitchen\u2014the kitchen is basically built as an office with a kitchen. There\u2019s a big table, it\u2019s lit for work, and there are lots of outlets. You can always just plug in, and there\u2019s no excuse not to get some work done.<\/p>\n

I think it\u2019s important if you\u2019re a creative person, or aspire to be, that you don\u2019t spend too much time aspiring or asking advice. Just get going and address what\u2019s roaring inside you.<\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019ve asked advice a couple of times in my life. Please don\u2019t misconstrue this as me thinking I\u2019m beyond reproach or criticism and everything I do is great or right. I\u2019m just not waiting around that much. If I\u2019ve got an idea, I\u2019m just acting on it.<\/p>\n

I think the only time I\u2019ve asked for advice is from Ian MacKaye\u2026 well, not really advice. When I was offered the job to be in Black Flag, I went on this audition. I didn\u2019t tell him. I just went to New York, did it, came back, and he said, \u201cWhere have you been the last day?\u201d I told him this crazy story. I said, \u201cI\u2019m the singer of Black Flag now.\u201d He went, \u201cWhat?\u201d I explained, you know, I did the audition and I got it, I\u2019m leaving. I said, \u201cSo, what do you think?\u201d And he said, \u201cAre you kidding? This is gonna be great,\u201d and he took me to the bus station. I still have the Greyhound bus ticket. That\u2019s the only time I ever really asked like, \u201cWhat do you reckon?\u201d<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t look for advice. Could I be taught a thing or two? Oh, hell yeah. I\u2019d rather just get it from trial and error and figuring out how I get through the maze.<\/p>\n

Defining Success and Failure<\/h2>\n

I don\u2019t look for an outside opinion. I must be true to the idea. I\u2019m not doing this to point to a shelf and say, \u201cLook at all those things that I did.\u201d I\u2019m not trying to impress anyone. In fact, I keep one or five of everything I ever did squirreled away in an area that\u2019s hard to get to. It\u2019s not sitting prominently like over the mantle.<\/p>\n

When something\u2019s done, I\u2019ll go, \u201cOkay, cool,\u201d and I\u2019ll shelve it, and I\u2019ll rejoice that the damn thing is done and my desktop is empty so I can fill it with the next project. I\u2019m a shipbuilder. I don\u2019t want to sail in them. I want you to sail in them. I\u2019m just happy that they leave the harbor so I can have an empty workplace.<\/span> And the glee of getting the component parts and starting from scratch starts all over again, and we build the next ark.<\/p>\n

Success to me is, \u201cYep, holds water. Someone else might dig this. I sidestep my ego to really look at this, and it still does not suck too hard.\u201d Wrap your knuckles on the hood and send it out into the light of day. Then take about 30 seconds to go, \u201cYeah!\u201d Then get back to work. To me, that\u2019s a very utilitarian, very kind of punk rock post punk look at things. It\u2019s like working at Factory Records. You made a good product, now go make another. I\u2019m not warmed by my own. I know people who really love playing their own records and playing you their records. I\u2019m divorced from a project of mine as soon as I\u2019m done with it. I want to use any available amount of time to start hurling myself into the next thing.<\/span><\/p>\n

Not being afraid to fail<\/h2>\n

You gotta fail. You gotta go out and blowout. If you\u2019ve never failed, that\u2019s how you lose a fight in the ring.<\/span> It\u2019s good to go on stage and bomb. I mean, I\u2019ve done it a few times. You learn what not to do again. It\u2019s good. Failure is good. Failure leads to success. Being rude to people teaches you politeness. I abhor rudeness. I hate it. Whenever I\u2019m rude, I never mean it. It slips out. I\u2019m tired. I didn\u2019t look at the situation well enough. I was impatient, and I fall all over myself in apology. But it\u2019s a damn good lesson.<\/p>\n

Failure is your friend. Those who think they\u2019ve never failed? Man, there are blessings in those failures that they should acknowledge. Every time I\u2019ve blown out, hopefully I took the value of that.<\/p>\n

\u201cJust Do It\u201d<\/h2>\n

The Nike brand is scary but the sentiment is good. That \u201cjust do it\u201d thing, that\u2019s how you get to do a bunch of things. I just say yes a lot. That\u2019s how I\u2019ve ended up in like 30 movies and a bunch of TV. I\u2019ve never taken acting lessons. I just want to do stuff. Like, \u201cHey, they offered you a part in this movie. Do you want to be in it?\u201d \u2026 \u201cYeah. What is it?\u201d I said yes first because sitting around, it drives me crazy. I don\u2019t do vacations. I travel, but I don\u2019t do vacations. I don\u2019t go anywhere that\u2019s leisurely. I come back six pounds lighter than having a parasite. Just because life\u2019s too short.<\/p>\n

Someone once said that when you buy a book, you\u2019re not really buying the book\u2014you\u2019re buying the time you think you\u2019ll have to read it. It\u2019s like all those records you say you\u2019ll listen to some day, but that day never comes. 50 finds you real fast. Like, you\u2019re 28, and all of a sudden, you\u2019re 50. It happens so fast. And that \u201cwoulda, coulda, shoulda\u201d? You better do it while you still have knees. You better do it before you start getting up and everything pops and clicks because, man, it changes.<\/p>\n

People put stuff off, like the angry guy who didn\u2019t climb the mountain when he was 20 because there wasn\u2019t time. No, you didn\u2019t make time. Any project\u2026 \u201cOne day, I\u2019m gonna write that novel.\u201d Pal? You better start tomorrow morning because the right time never happens. It\u2019s when you boldly determine it. It\u2019s like running on a rainy day. You\u2019re fine once you get out there. The only difficulty is getting off the couch when you lace your shoes up.<\/span><\/p>\n

That hesitation, that\u2019s what holds a lot of people back. That\u2019s why I never say, \u201cI\u2019m a writer,\u201d because I don\u2019t want to shoulder that. I just want to do some writing. \u201cWhat would a writer do in this situation?\u201d I don\u2019t know, man. Ask one. And don\u2019t tell me what he said, I\u2019m busy.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not a tough guy. I\u2019m not brave. I\u2019m just curious. I\u2019m very well aware of how quickly life goes.<\/span> You know, Ian [MacKaye] and I both have a lot of dead friends. Everything from suicide to overdose to wrong place, wrong time. There\u2019s a lot to get done. Whether you want to deal with that or not is up to the individual. You just make up your mind, like, \u201cI\u2019m gonna write this book.\u201d How many people are gonna read it? I don\u2019t care. How can I control that? I just want to do the damn thing. That allows me to go unrestrained.<\/p>\n

I always have like five books going at once. That anyone will read them, that\u2019d be cool. But I\u2019m not making them to get read; I\u2019m making them to get them out of me. You gotta do something with your life. You can watch TV. You can inhale cocaine. Or you can sit down and write, or sing, or jump up and down, whatever it is. It\u2019s all just choices. So much of this is just committing to the time and the discipline and the agony of creativity\u2014because it turns on you all the time.<\/span><\/p>\n

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Henry Rollins recommends:<\/strong><\/p>\n

Here are five people who I really got a lot from. Not necessarily how I do my thing, but five people who really impacted my life.<\/p>\n