Five Ways I Use My Jewish Space Laser

In a leaked Facebook post, Rep. Majorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) claimed that the 2018 California Camp Fire was caused by a “laser beam or light beam” fired by “Rothschild Inc.” This is pure anti-Semitism; obviously, Jews have better uses for their space lasers, as Jason Adam Katzenstein demonstrates.

1) To slice the refrigerated bagels that I’m too lazy to heat up.


2) To hastily light candles in advance of the Zoom with my parents where I prove to them that I haven’t lost the chanukiah they gave me.


3) We had one at my bris.


4) To play laser tag at the secret Jewish meetings that Marjorie Taylor Greene is on to us about so I mean no these do not exist.


5) I tried using it Men in Black style to “neuralize” myself into not knowing about Marjorie Taylor Greene but it didn’t work so here we are.


This post was originally published on Current Affairs.


Print Share Comment Cite Upload Translate Updates
APA
Jason Adam Katzenstein | radiofree.asia (2021-11-29T08:18:52+00:00) » Five Ways I Use My Jewish Space Laser. Retrieved from https://radiofree.asia/2021/01/29/five-ways-i-use-my-jewish-space-laser/.
MLA
" » Five Ways I Use My Jewish Space Laser." Jason Adam Katzenstein | radiofree.asia - Friday January 29, 2021, https://radiofree.asia/2021/01/29/five-ways-i-use-my-jewish-space-laser/
HARVARD
Jason Adam Katzenstein | radiofree.asia Friday January 29, 2021 » Five Ways I Use My Jewish Space Laser., viewed 2021-11-29T08:18:52+00:00,<https://radiofree.asia/2021/01/29/five-ways-i-use-my-jewish-space-laser/>
VANCOUVER
Jason Adam Katzenstein | radiofree.asia - » Five Ways I Use My Jewish Space Laser. [Internet]. [Accessed 2021-11-29T08:18:52+00:00]. Available from: https://radiofree.asia/2021/01/29/five-ways-i-use-my-jewish-space-laser/
CHICAGO
" » Five Ways I Use My Jewish Space Laser." Jason Adam Katzenstein | radiofree.asia - Accessed 2021-11-29T08:18:52+00:00. https://radiofree.asia/2021/01/29/five-ways-i-use-my-jewish-space-laser/
IEEE
" » Five Ways I Use My Jewish Space Laser." Jason Adam Katzenstein | radiofree.asia [Online]. Available: https://radiofree.asia/2021/01/29/five-ways-i-use-my-jewish-space-laser/. [Accessed: 2021-11-29T08:18:52+00:00]
rf:citation
» Five Ways I Use My Jewish Space Laser | Jason Adam Katzenstein | radiofree.asia | https://radiofree.asia/2021/01/29/five-ways-i-use-my-jewish-space-laser/ | 2021-11-29T08:18:52+00:00
To access this feature you must login or create an account.



A Free News Initiative

Investigative Journalism for People, Not Profits.

Discussion